Integrating your Erotic Wilderness

TRANSCRIPT:

KATE : For the feminine and for women, it is like this instinctual wilderness that is directly, like, correlated to our erotic nature. When you speak about, you know, agriculture and that history, it's also we've slowly been separated from this wilderness, from our true nature, from our instinctual animal bodies, and we've been conditioned into this like box. Like, okay, this is how you're a man, this is how you're a woman. And the body is starving in that in those conditions. And then we get married, and we create families, and it creates disasters and all of the things.

Because with this, the relational aspect is actually instinctual. The relational reality is actually through the nervous system. It's through the body. And so if there's this blindness of how to be in the body and how to tend the relational field through the body, then it creates this disconnect that ultimately just further perpetuates separation.

So for women also, you know, we've had the witch hunts, we've had the tearing down of the temples, and we've had, you know, exactly like the same process of we've been removed from this impulse of love. We've been removed from how love wants to flow through our bodies, and it's become like a source of fear and shame and deep terror that we have to kind of peel back the layers of to be able to come back to this like instinctual source of what is already inside us as women.

I remember like, you know, growing up and having this such deep longing in me, there was such deep longing that I just couldn't find a place for. Like, this longing to to know love, to feel love, to express love. And I was totally repressed, and I was totally contorted, and it was painful, and I was like, argh! And I couldn't find the way in the world until I started to do my journey, and I met my teachers, and really found a place that this love force could come through my body and could be expressed. And it's been a slow and winding like, I kind of say it's like geological time, like, it's, it's the time of, like, the stone formation, it's, it's the time of, like, how the river, like, creates its shape. Like, it's been this slow unfurling because there haven't been that many, like elders or maps or models, but luckily, I found teachers along the way that can support this process.

But much of my revelation of the erotic was through my relationship with the natural world. Like the natural world just kept on showing me this, this and this and this. And through that relationship with the natural world, I was able to create this safety and this knowing in my body that allowed the deep Eros of the world, of the earth to just start coming through.

And then, as I've done, you know, so I've kind of done that in in the underworld, I've kind of done that in my own private process. I've done that behind the veil. And then, you know, after 13 years of doing that, like, for the like, 10 years of doing that, I was like, Well, how does this bridge to men? You know how I've got this wild current of erotic life force flowing through me that's just like, unstoppable and untameable. And you know, the men that I would meet were, it would blow them out. And then so that's when I came across the teacher training. And you know, was in the presence of men of like, oh, it's not blowing out these men. These men can totally handle it. And these men have trained their bodies to be able to meet like, the fullness of love that's coursing through my body, because they have had the training of being deeply rooted in their cock and their balls and their centre and all of the things.

So it's like, you know, it is like this whole rewire, I think what we're speaking about, and it's very hard to contextualise, but hopefully, you know, it kind of makes sense that this whole part of our oppressed wilderness is what we are reframing here, in this in these practices of masculine feminine embodiment, like there is a space for your wilderness. There is a space for your erotic nature, and when you fully allow that to come online and integrate it into your being with consciousness, because I think there's a lot of fear of that being integrated, because it comes out unconsciously, and it creates havoc, and it creates destruction and and people then, you know, it comes out, and it bursts out. And then people do these crazy things, and they're like, oh, I shouldn't have done that. And they put it down again. And then, like, and then, actually, that, you know, the way to do it is actually to turn towards it and bring it up, bring it up, like, embody it. Like, like you said, with, you know, with your client, like, you know, the practice that you gave him, until one day it's like, Oh, I get it, I've got it, I've got it. And then once he's got it, or once, you know, there's many practices that allow us to do that, then that thing, that kind of life-force, that expression can then become integrated, and then we can start relating with consciousness, with with this wilderness, essentially.

SPEED : And all of a sudden, we feel so much more fulfilled, so much more like connection and intimacy and the flow of Love and consciousness moving through our bodies. I was, I sort of leapt up when you said, I've got all this wilderness that I found in me, but I keep blowing men out, and then I found these men in teacher training who can hold that. It's not just that we can hold it, it's that it lights us the fuck up to hold, like it completes the circuit, it completes the circle.

And so, you know, so many men are suffering from loneliness and disconnection and a sense that they don't know how to be men in the world, precisely because of this. To, you know, telescope it down; when we get wide and grounded and feel our balls and our body and our heart all of a sudden, life it, I don't know if it's appropriate, like I used to be a television writer. Like in Stranger Things, there's this place called the Upside-Down that looks just like this world, but it's full of dreariness, and the F stop has changed, because there's No saturation of colour, and it's it's full of demons, and it's an awful, awful place to be. And then you turn on this innate wilderness (I love that) within us, and there is a polarity to that, but, but only to a degree, because you have a beautiful masculine. I've seen your masculine. I have a beautiful feminine. You've seen my feminine but we can we're there in different and then we start the flow of it, that that that completes that yin yang circle, and all of a sudden everything feels vibrant and alive and whole, because we're in our bodies and in the present.

And when I'm across from a practitioner, or a human being in the in, in the wild, off the mat, who is bringing her full expression of the truth of her body in the moment ? Oh, yes!